Catherine Zeta-Jones promoted her unnaturally hot ass off in Sydney this weekend. She did press for her latest movie Death Defying Acts. I don't even know what it's about, but who cares? It stars Catherine Zeta-Jones. I'd watch a five-hour documentary about the bassoon if she was in it. I included pictures of her husband Michael "I met Abe Lincoln" Douglas who stayed in LA. Probably because he has to stay on his native soil or else those around him will suffer the mummy's curse. And by curse I mean stories about that time he forgot to take his blood thinner.